For some reason today I find myself longing for the Advent to arrive this year. I wish it would start tomorrow. I feel the need to experience the hope that this month before the birth of Our Lord, Jesus, brings. But even if this "time" is more awaited than ever, I know I can start my prior Advent recollection.
The Good News, the assurance of Salvation is definitely something to look forward to . But even though He was born, and all Christians rejoice on this fact, He used 33 years to actually, get us to know what was in His mind, what was His plan.
This means to me that, all above, what I need is patience and meekness.
The controversies of the world and the heaviness of the developments of this year so far has been suffocating in many levels, and the idea of quiet time for meditation and preparation to face whatever is up to come, feels mandatory in order to find balance in a chaotic environment.
It looks like a challenge that could be unreachable butt with the help of God.
I feel tired. Tired because trying to live my faith in a secular world with the intensity I want is difficult, plus I have my own wild horses to tame and ride too. In a macro spectrum, to be tranquil observes like a titanic work, but then again, I try to contemplate.
Contemplate how good life is, beautifully filled of contrast. The temptation to put in my eyes criticism towards those who live everyday as good as they can, as good as they know, vanishes. And once again, The King of Kings shows his majesty and I kneel down and surrender.
But yes I am tired, I continue, and then, what Mathew described in the Gospel come with the strength and beauty of a lightning to console me. Because that is what He does, to soothe and caress the soul in despair, the restless child or stunned resisting of falling asleep.
..."Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me; for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.” And then I know, I can take a rest.
After His word, everything seems right, everything makes sense.
One of the books I use for my meditations, that I am reading as I write, describes that God is not expecting more than we can do or give. He is not demanding extraordinary things from us, from me. He wants and receives just that we try to give Him, or that we do with our best efforts. He knows how sincere and loving we go through our daily tasks, and for Him, that is enough.
The one who is sad, says the book, is sad because of pride, because one is desiring more than at the moment is ready to bear. It seems that we want to engage in a race for perfection in a blink. As if the matters of the soul attends to a speed, or is listed in some kind of course that teaches how to be a saint express. There is not such thing.
So when we fall, naturally, He is not surprised.
It is the pride which pushes us to believe or act, like we were perfect already. Without thinking that, true love is a dish to be cooked for as much as we live. Love can not be rushed.
The higher you feel, the lower you are. In the matters of the soul, maths are not essentials.
But as a I was saying at the beginning, I cant wait til Advent is here, because it is then when I get my present. The most beautiful and meaningful of all. I receive that letter with the Good News. That I am and will be saved.
I got it every year, and it renews every time. Year by year comes with more resolution than the year before. It comes with the seal of peace, in the envelope of a brand new hope. I can´t wait til Advent is here.